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Saturday 27 December 2008

A Joke I actually remembered

I see the Iceland is still hanging around the South Beach Estate or Hungry Hill as it used to be called where the butcher that used to travel around would be asked for 2,oz of best mince please.or another term was we had a leg of mince for dinner, all fur coat and no Knickers, those lot ,so I was told.
Here is a joke that for once I could actually remember, totally stolen ,robbed ,nicked , twocked (work it out),or what ever the modern term is.
A guy walks in to a kebab shop and is surprised to see Father Christmas serving behind the counter."Santa!" he says. "What are you doing working here? Shouldn't you be up at the North Pole preparing for the big day?"Santa Claus sighs. He's really let himself go. The red suit's got lard and chilli sauce and bits of lettuce all over it. His apron's in a mess and he just looks fed up and like he doesn't want to be serving up kebabs for a living."Well," Santa says at last, "the business has gone belly up. With the recession, the credit crunch and all, the toy industry took a beating. I had to lay off some of the elves, make cut backs in quality and we just lost our competitive edge. Plus we wound up the delivery side and subcontracted out to UPS. But... it didn't help. The receivers came in, asset-stripped the business and we went into liquidation.""Gee," the guy says. "I'm really sorry; it kind of takes the tradition out of Christmas in a way.""Yeah," says Santa Claus and manages a wan smile. "Well enough of me and my woes. What can I get you?"The guy says, "I'll have a large Donner.""Sorry," says Santa. "We're all out of Donner.......Will Blitzen do instead?"
A more sensible post to follow, when and if I ever sober up !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
p.s. despite my state the spell check has only picked out twocked as misspelled, go figure!!!! ?
actually there probably should not be a k in there , well what do I know I have never twocked before.

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